Brock Turner texted pics of his unconscious victim’s breasts to his friends

According to Brock’s dad, he shouldn’t be judged for his “20 minutes of action.” Brock argued throughout the whole trial the sexual assault and rape was “consensual.” So, Snapchatting your pals pics of your victim’s boobies was totally cool with her too?

When is this acceptance of sexual assault and violence against women going to end!?

Oh, and he shouldn’t be on the registry, Papa Turner? Yes. Yes he should. Because this is not what normal, loving consensual sexual activity looks like: undressing an unconscious woman in order to expose her breasts and genitals, snapchatting friends her naked body parts, then raping said unconscious woman behind a dumpster with fingers and other foreign objects found lying on the ground.

Don’t be silent. Speak up against sexual assault and violence.

I love this: To Brock’s Father from Another Father

I love this letter to Brock Turner’s father from another father. He addresses how a father feels, but also the responsibility of a father.

This is by far my favorite paragraph:

If his life has been “deeply altered” it is because he has horribly altered another human being; because he made a reprehensible choice to take advantage of someone for his own pleasure. This young woman will be dealing with this for far longer than the embarrassingly short six months your son is being penalized. She will endure the unthinkable trauma of his “20 minutes of action” for the duration of her lifetime, and the fact that you seem unaware of this fact is exactly why we have a problem.

Read this letter, and read the victim’s. They are very poignant pieces.

See more of my pieces I have written on sexual assault.

Rape is a huge misunderstanding

If people don’t know what sexual assault and rape are, how can they tell what is rape and what isn’t? We need to educate students about positive relationships and what sexual assault and rape are.

Sadly, in many schools, we’re lucky to get outdated videos shown in health class.

Young people are obviously not getting the information early enough to affect their lives. For example, let’s take the author of this letter regarding convicted Stanford rapist, Brock Turner. His childhood friend, Leslie, kindly wrote a letter defending Brock. In this letter, there are a few mistakes. I’m going to break this down for everyone. You might want to get a snack because there’s a lot of “confusion” in this letter.

It was with great sadness that I read the news about Brock Turner, and the horrible situation that he was involved in.

You must mean the horrible situation he…created. Again, who forced him to do any of these things? Alcohol does not eat, breathe or asleep. A kindergartener could tell you ‘alcohol’ is not alive. Being alcohol is not alive, it cannot make you do anything. Yes, it hinders your judgement, but it’s still your judgement.

In those years, he was always very respectful of everyone.

People who commit sexual assault and rape are not masked strangers. They can be very nice people. My rapist was my friend. A friend I had known for a few years.

We all knew he’d swim in the Olympics one day.

Again with the swimming! Stop ignoring terrible life choices in light of athletic ability.

They all seem like such good kids brought up by two very cool and grounded parents.

Sure. No one says, “I’m gonna raise a rapist!” and no one ever says, “I’m going to be a rapist when I grow up!” Good people make bad decisions. He could be a very good kid in all other aspects of his life, but he made a very wrong decision in this instance and should have to pay for that decision.

If I had to choose one kid I graduated with to be in the position Brock is, it would have never been him.

You need to let go of your childhood vision of Brock. He may have been that nice guy back then, but he also may have been objectifying women. People are good at hiding their nougatty centers.

I could name off 5 others that I wouldn’t be surprised about.

Ha! Those 5 might actually be nice people. Maybe they weren’t star athletes and maybe you didn’t know them, but just judged from afar. Maybe they’re creepers. Four-fifths of sexual assaults are committed by people you know much of the time.

It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to know that alcohol increases emotions and feelings. 

Scenario: I’m angry and go get my gun because I am particularly annoyed at my neighbor right now. I shoot him, killing him, as a result. I’m a murderer, right? Oh, but I had been drinking heavily so now it’s all good because I was extra emotional?

I think this is all a huge misunderstanding.

How exactly? He didn’t take her overcoat by mistake, or try to get into her car, which happened to be identical to his, or bump into her spilling his coffee on her. Behind a dumpster, he stripped an unconscious woman just enough to provide himself access to her breasts and her genitals, as though she were some sort of utility. Please let me know your misunderstanding of the situation and I’ll help clarify it for you.

Brock is not a monster.

To you, no. To the victim, yes. Yes, he is. He is her personal boogyman. He taints her dreams. He sours her waking life. He violates her sexual interactions in her loving relationships. You may not see a monster, but she does.

I have known him much longer than the people involved in his case.

People change. People make bad decisions. Unless you were with him that night, you can’t say anything about his character at that point. Only Brock knows what he was thinking. And really, who would walk into court shouting their guilt from the hilltops? Of course he’s not going to say anything truthful.

I don’t think it’s fair to base the fate of the next 10+ years of his life on the decision of a girl who doesn’t remember anything but the amount she drank to press charges against him.

So, Brock raped her because she was drunk? And if she doesn’t remember anything, the 2 bicyclists and the police and the nurses and the doctors and the counselors should just forget all of what they saw too?

I am not blaming her directly for this, because that isn’t right.

Yes, you are, but I have hope you will get educated and see your flaws in your arguments.

But where do we draw the line and stop worrying about being politically correct every second of the day and see that rape on campuses isn’t always because people are rapists.

They’re not tree-leapers. Rapists are people too and odds are, besides Brock, you know someone who has sexually assaulted someone. You certainly know someone who has been sexually assaulted. Whether or not they know, in either case, is questionable. Does that excuse the assaulter from guilt then?

It is because these universities market themselves as the biggest party schools in the country.

Stanford, to me, is not a party school first, but one of good academics. Also, I cannot remember the last time I saw keggers mentioned in a college brochure.

They encourage drinking.

Girl, please. I think you just made every student affairs professional’s eyes roll. Would you like to handle campus judicials? Be my guest. The load would be so much lighter if these students would not drink. Maybe on-call staff and college VPs would get to sleep through the night on weekends. We discourage drinking until we’re blue in the face!

This is completely different from a woman getting kidnapped and raped as she is walking to her car in a parking lot. That is a rapist.

Yes, and so is Brock. There are many types of rape.

These are idiot boys and girls having too much to drink and not being aware of their surroundings and having clouded judgement. 

Another scenario: I drink and drive. I have an accident. I kill a man. That is called vehicular homicide. Why is it not just clouded judgement?

I’m not saying that is every case because I know there are young men that take advantage of young women and vice versa, but I know for a fact that Brock is not one of those people.

Why not? Because you played kickball as kids together?

He is respectful and caring, talented, and smart enough to know better.

Yeah, he probably is smart enough to know better. But also maybe he isn’t. Maybe he wasn’t taught to respect women. Maybe sex education and sexual assault weren’t covered where you all grew up. That doesn’t excuse his behavior though.

The trouble with thoughts like this young lady’s is that they’re contagious. They’re diminishing to victims. They ignore the facts. I hope one day she realizes what sexual assault and rape really are. I hope if she ever has to support a friend or loved one who was sexually assaulted, she will whole-heartedly support them.

Now go forth and share what you’ve learned. Or just share my posts about sexual assault. If we’re silent, someone else will become a victim.

Victim blaming has got to STOP!

We have all heard it. Some may even slip into it accidentally. We may not recognize it.

Victim blaming.

Victim blaming can happen with any sort of crime.

Robbery
“Oh, they shouldn’t leave their curtains open because people can see right in!”

Mugging
They shouldn’t have been out so late at night.”

Sexual harassment
“Well, she shouldn’t wear such revealing clothing.”

Racism
“What did they expect driving through a predominately white neighborhood!?”

Sexual assault
She was asking for it.”
She made me want her.”
She said ‘yes’ once before.”
She sent me the wrong message.”
She shouldn’t have gotten drunk.”
“I couldn’t help it. She has a hot body.”
She’s the one who decided to break up with me.”
“If she didn’t want to be raped, she shouldn’t have worn that.”

The list for sexual assault victim blaming, just like in the crimes above, goes on and on. The difference with racism and sexual assault are those are crimes against a person. A violation of their human rights. Racism and sexual assault are NEVER the victim’s fault. For this piece, I’m going to focus on sexual assault considering the recent events in the Stanford rapist case.

Sexual assault is NEVER the victim’s fault.

Maybe someone can tell this to the Stanford rapist and his father. Brock Turner was sentenced to merely 6 months in county jail for violently raping a woman while unconscious (please read her powerful letter addressing the court and Brock) after dragging her behind a dumpster and manipulating her clothes so he could access her breasts and genitals. The maximum was 14 years and prosecution only asked for 6 years.

Dan Turner, father of convicted rapist Brock Turner, wrote some interesting pieces in his letter to the court of Brock’s sentencing: “That is a steep price to pay for 20 minutes of action…” He’s 20 years-old and you have failed to teach your son how to respect other humans. I don’t care about how much weight he’s lost. I could give a crap less about his Olympic potential. He. Raped. Another. Person. He made his choice that night in January and now he has to suffer the consequences, which are all too light. But by far, my favorite quote is: “Brock can do so many positive things as a contributor to society and is totally committed to educating other college age students about the dangers of alcohol consumption and sexual promiscuity.”

Yes. Alcohol and sexual promiscuity made him do it.

First, alcohol. So there were how many other drunk people at that frat party and how many of them raped other people? How many people get sloshed at bars across every American city each day of the week and how many rapes are caused by that daily consumption of alcohol?

Now, sexual promiscuity. We talked about this above. Sexual assault is never the victim’s fault. Not ever. But damn that woman for wearing a beige cardigan and a dress! How sexually promiscuous! BEIGE! I have never seen anything hotter than a beige cardigan. Even had she been naked, she should not have been raped or even touched.

He chose her because she was drunk. He sought her out because she was the wounded giselle separated from the herd. And this predator only gets 6 months in jail so he can go tell women at colleges across America how to not turn on men so they don’t get raped.

Read more…

 

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